At my last doctors appointment he had told me I was 1-2 cm dilated and about to lose my mucus plug. I am pretty sure I lost it around 10:56 p.m. that night. Not that I have a clue what a mucus plug looks like, and it may just have been wishful thinking on my part... And then nothing happened for days. I was mad! Of course I was convinced I was going to go into labor the very next day, so I rushed off to get a manicure and french pedi. I am telling you, my vanity knows no bounds!
Monday night DM and I hung out as usual in the evenings, and then decided to finish watching the English version of 'The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo" that we had started previously and never finished. I don't know why, but DM hates going to bed early and I love to sleep. I usually lose in that tug of war and end up staying up with him. I think I still feel guilty about being up late on a 'school night!'
After the movie we went headed to bed. I was so tired and DM started reading his book instead of making any move towards going to sleep. I said to him that it was way past his bed time and he had a early morning, and he was like, 'yeah let me just finish this' so with a resigned sigh I grabbed my own book and started to read just to wait him out.
All evening the sharp bladder pains I have mentioned before were plaguing me, and I seriously thought my baby had lost it and was in a head butting war with my bladder. Usually it only happens when I initially go to bed a few times, but this night it was all through the evening and the movie. As I was sitting there reading it just got SO intense and frequent, and all of a sudden there was a pop and a not insignificant (but not a gush) of fluid came out of me around 11:27 p.m. I touched it and looked at DM in shock the way the person in movies does who has been shot in the stomach, touches the blood, and looks at it on their fingers like they can't believe it. He was like, 'your water just broke' and got a towel to put under me on the bed, but a part of me couldn't believe it because it wasn't the intense volumes of water I expected, and I kept going between, "I swear I don't think I peed myself" and "but is that amniotic fluid?!?!?" I was pretty calm and a part of me knew that was it, but another part of me was internally hyper ventilating and kicking into overdrive. I had to stop and just breathe. So I put on a pad like they instructed at the pre-natal class, pulled up my hospital bag list (on excel of course lol), and started getting my last minute stuff together. Once I was ready DM was all like, 'lets go' and I just gave him a kiss and said that now that we knew we had to go in anyways I wanted to take a shower. As I was moving around to pack my bag the flow got faster and faster and the pad really wasn't keeping up. That pretty much removed every doubt in my mind that my water had broken....
So, in true Bollywood Barbie style, I took my shower, blew out and straightened my hair, did my makeup, and matched my underwear to my outfit. It calmed me down to feel put together and in control, and anyone who knows me would not be surprised by this at all. DM didn't even bat an eyelash, although he did find it hilarious. And then I was ready to go, and DM had the foresight to add the towel he had put on the bed under me in the car... Thank god, because a few minutes from the hospital it was like a dam broke and the most unimaginable volume of fluid flowed out of me soaking my maternity yoga pant to the knees and I was freaking out about the seat since the towel was no match. DM was like, 'relax, the seats are leather and there is not much you can do about it right now..." But getting out of the car I felt so disgusting all soaked, even though my pants were black and you couldn't tell at all. Perk of being married to a physician is parking in the spot right by the door of the emergency entrance ;)!
We went right up to the second floor and a nurse named Rachel took me to a room to check my pad, change me into a gown, and ask me questions while DM went to get me admitted down stairs. She checked me and I was 3 cm dilated at this point.
Then once it was ascertained that indeed my water had broken, which was bloody at this point- a fact nobody seemed concerned in the least about but me- they moved me to a large room with an even larger bathroom where I would be delivering. I met the doctor who was on call - the woman who I had had one appointment with when my obstetrician was on holidays, but she wouldn't be delivering my baby as she was done in the morning. By this point it was around 1:00 a.m. Because I was Group B Strep positive and had zero contractions they wanted to give me at least three courses of antibiotics before they induced me. I was hooked up to the IV, asked them to shut off the lights, and DM hit the recliner in the corner and we both dozed. Well, sort of. The IV hurt like a... Like no joke, trying to sleep with that throbbing in my wrist was hell. I have had one IV before when I was put under for oral surgery on the top of my hand. I will take that any day instead of at the base of my thumb! The whole time all this was going on there was a woman down the all screaming and moaning like someone was using ancient torture methods on her. Rachel said to me, "don't worry about that, it's just a sound track we play to scare you guys!" and later when it continued we were both just like ummm lets ignore this. At some point in the night the sound was replaced by a baby crying.
Around 4:17 a.m. another nurse (Rachel was on break) came in and hooked me up to the oxytocin to induce me (finally!) Nothing happened for a while, and then suddenly the most intense and clear contractions started to build and then disipate. I started using the contraction timer app on my phone around to make sure it was actually getting regular, but within a very short period I went from being curious to moaning through each one with timing being the last thing on my mind. By 4:26 a.m. the app said I was having contractions for almost a minute ever 6-7 minutes or so, and the frequency and duration just increased exponentially from there. DM came to stand by me from his sleeping spot and tried getting me to grab his hand through each one, but I was happier grabbing the bed railing and clutching it while he stroked my arm. Let me tell you, it is the worse kind of pain you can ever feel. I have a high pain tolerance, but feeling like you were being wrenched across your abdomen from inside is like no other pain. Rachel came in when the frequency wasn't that much and said if I wanted something for pain to let her know, but I was operating under some sort of delusion that I didn't have real contractions yet and they were managable. Well clearly that ended soon, because a few contractions in and she came back and I was all about the pain management ASAP. I always knew I was getting an epidural, but I thought it was too early at this point. However, she said past 3 cm, which I came in at, I could have it. So I jumped on board, headed to pee one last time, and literally before I got out of the bathroom the anesthetist was in the room and ready to go.
The epidural itself was really easy for me mentally since I am not someone who freaks out about needles and what not. It was quick, painless, and easy. He said it would kick in about 15 minutes but I swear it was so much quicker. By 5:30 a.m. I had my epidural and ladies there has not been a sweeter invention! Ever. My legs were heavy and beautiful tingly, the pain disappeared, I loved everyone, I felt so incredible and I could focus on the world around me again. And I slept! Oh that epidural is amazing! I can't even begin to explain how relief from that kind of pain feels like... Bliss. Pure bliss.
Okay, enough about the epidural - which I would marry if I could...
Somewhere during my snoozing I heard Rachel say to DM she was off and that congratulations and good luck. I liked Rachel. She was pretty awesome. Then I got a new nurse. A sweet, pretty Indian girl with a Sikh name I missed. I swear she was probably the age of my little sister, which made me feel old- even though I realize you are all rolling your eyes at my 25 years of youth. We really hit it off too, and she was there for the rest of my labor.
At 9:15 she checked me and I was 6-7 cm dialated. Another beautiful thing about the epidural is that they can prod you up there as far as they like and it doesn't hurt. That epidural, I tell you... Anyways, after that my little guys heart rate kept dropping because of the cord being wrapped around his neck and they were a little concerned. So again at 9:30 they decided to check again and I was at 10 cm. At some point I had met the new doctor, a pretty brunette who said to DM, "I recognize you from somewhere." Turns out she was a few years ahead of him at medical school. I liked her a lot, but I was high so I pretty much liked everyone at this point! They decided it was best to get me pushing, so it began. Since I couldn't feel my contractions, aside from intense pressure on my butt in the middle of the contraction, they had to tell me when to start pushing. Eventually I knew when they were starting and could do it myself. Apparently I was a really good pusher, because literally a few pushes in the nurse wanted me to stop since she 'didn't want to deliver him' and I was going too fast. The whole time DM and the nurse were telling me about how much hair he had I was thinking, "you are all bull shitting me to get me to push more," but apparently they weren't. Since you can't feel any pain you can't imagine his head is crowning!
There was some issue about how the doctor was going to a C-section and they wanted to decide whether she would come to me first or that. I don't know what happened, but soon enough the doctor was there and we were really on the final push. She was also of the opinion that I was a 'unreal pusher,' but that may be something they just say to get you all motivated. Either way it worked and I just focused and pretended each push was going to be the one that did it, even though I knew otherwise. At one point the doctor said, "mom the head is out, you want to touch it?" and I was completely about it so I reached down and rubbed it and it was covered in hair, wet, and squishy and I just couldn't believe it. And then eventually they told me to stop pushing (a order I had told time and time again to heed by girlfriends who had torn like nobodies business) so I was zoned in on the doctors voice waiting to hear it, and then she got me to do little pulsing pushes. In the blink of an eye he slid out of me and the feeling was emptiness. Like I had been left with less than I started with.
At 10:27 a.m. my baby boy Zain was born and he came out screaming.
He was 20 inches long and weighed 7 lb. 2 oz.
They said he sounded a bit mucousy since he came out so fast he hadn't been squeezed long enough to clear his lungs. I always thought I would be hysterical, like in "A Baby Story," even though I am not a hysterical person. I figured that is just what happens, but I was happy and calm. I looked at him, smiled and said, "hi baby." They asked if I wanted him on my chest right away, and I said 'yes please' and I just stared at him. Just stared. OMG okay here come the tears. I guess writing about it is different from living it with all the chaos. In between gazing at my baby the doctor told me my placenta came out, and eventually they took Zain away to clean and weigh him while the nurse massaged my stomach.
I asked the doctor and her resident if I tore and she said that I had a small second degree one, and I lay there listening to the doctor instruct the resident how to place the stitches. Residents don't really worry me, they have to learn at some point. You can't feel anything even at this point so you don't realize that being stitched up from front to back, no matter how 'minor,' will be the most arduous part of this experience. Thank god for Motrin!
They finally brought him back, and DM and I were in a daze. In my case one that was not drug induced. I was in awe, he was just ecstatic. After waiting so long he was finally here. DM had called our parents when I started pushing and soon they came to visit me and baby. Eventually they moved me to my post-partum recovery room. We wanted a private room, but due to high volume there were none available and I had to share one with a woman who had just had a C-section with a thin curtain in between and one bathroom. Not the highlight of the experience, but it was fine considering I knew I would be discharged after one night. Our parents and my sisters hung out for a bit and then I sent DM with them to go for lunch.
I'll take it from there in the next post! So much more to tell.
Until then, I am going to enjoy my little Monkey! He is cuter every single day. I love him so much.
Monday night DM and I hung out as usual in the evenings, and then decided to finish watching the English version of 'The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo" that we had started previously and never finished. I don't know why, but DM hates going to bed early and I love to sleep. I usually lose in that tug of war and end up staying up with him. I think I still feel guilty about being up late on a 'school night!'
After the movie we went headed to bed. I was so tired and DM started reading his book instead of making any move towards going to sleep. I said to him that it was way past his bed time and he had a early morning, and he was like, 'yeah let me just finish this' so with a resigned sigh I grabbed my own book and started to read just to wait him out.
All evening the sharp bladder pains I have mentioned before were plaguing me, and I seriously thought my baby had lost it and was in a head butting war with my bladder. Usually it only happens when I initially go to bed a few times, but this night it was all through the evening and the movie. As I was sitting there reading it just got SO intense and frequent, and all of a sudden there was a pop and a not insignificant (but not a gush) of fluid came out of me around 11:27 p.m. I touched it and looked at DM in shock the way the person in movies does who has been shot in the stomach, touches the blood, and looks at it on their fingers like they can't believe it. He was like, 'your water just broke' and got a towel to put under me on the bed, but a part of me couldn't believe it because it wasn't the intense volumes of water I expected, and I kept going between, "I swear I don't think I peed myself" and "but is that amniotic fluid?!?!?" I was pretty calm and a part of me knew that was it, but another part of me was internally hyper ventilating and kicking into overdrive. I had to stop and just breathe. So I put on a pad like they instructed at the pre-natal class, pulled up my hospital bag list (on excel of course lol), and started getting my last minute stuff together. Once I was ready DM was all like, 'lets go' and I just gave him a kiss and said that now that we knew we had to go in anyways I wanted to take a shower. As I was moving around to pack my bag the flow got faster and faster and the pad really wasn't keeping up. That pretty much removed every doubt in my mind that my water had broken....
So, in true Bollywood Barbie style, I took my shower, blew out and straightened my hair, did my makeup, and matched my underwear to my outfit. It calmed me down to feel put together and in control, and anyone who knows me would not be surprised by this at all. DM didn't even bat an eyelash, although he did find it hilarious. And then I was ready to go, and DM had the foresight to add the towel he had put on the bed under me in the car... Thank god, because a few minutes from the hospital it was like a dam broke and the most unimaginable volume of fluid flowed out of me soaking my maternity yoga pant to the knees and I was freaking out about the seat since the towel was no match. DM was like, 'relax, the seats are leather and there is not much you can do about it right now..." But getting out of the car I felt so disgusting all soaked, even though my pants were black and you couldn't tell at all. Perk of being married to a physician is parking in the spot right by the door of the emergency entrance ;)!
We went right up to the second floor and a nurse named Rachel took me to a room to check my pad, change me into a gown, and ask me questions while DM went to get me admitted down stairs. She checked me and I was 3 cm dilated at this point.
Then once it was ascertained that indeed my water had broken, which was bloody at this point- a fact nobody seemed concerned in the least about but me- they moved me to a large room with an even larger bathroom where I would be delivering. I met the doctor who was on call - the woman who I had had one appointment with when my obstetrician was on holidays, but she wouldn't be delivering my baby as she was done in the morning. By this point it was around 1:00 a.m. Because I was Group B Strep positive and had zero contractions they wanted to give me at least three courses of antibiotics before they induced me. I was hooked up to the IV, asked them to shut off the lights, and DM hit the recliner in the corner and we both dozed. Well, sort of. The IV hurt like a... Like no joke, trying to sleep with that throbbing in my wrist was hell. I have had one IV before when I was put under for oral surgery on the top of my hand. I will take that any day instead of at the base of my thumb! The whole time all this was going on there was a woman down the all screaming and moaning like someone was using ancient torture methods on her. Rachel said to me, "don't worry about that, it's just a sound track we play to scare you guys!" and later when it continued we were both just like ummm lets ignore this. At some point in the night the sound was replaced by a baby crying.
Around 4:17 a.m. another nurse (Rachel was on break) came in and hooked me up to the oxytocin to induce me (finally!) Nothing happened for a while, and then suddenly the most intense and clear contractions started to build and then disipate. I started using the contraction timer app on my phone around to make sure it was actually getting regular, but within a very short period I went from being curious to moaning through each one with timing being the last thing on my mind. By 4:26 a.m. the app said I was having contractions for almost a minute ever 6-7 minutes or so, and the frequency and duration just increased exponentially from there. DM came to stand by me from his sleeping spot and tried getting me to grab his hand through each one, but I was happier grabbing the bed railing and clutching it while he stroked my arm. Let me tell you, it is the worse kind of pain you can ever feel. I have a high pain tolerance, but feeling like you were being wrenched across your abdomen from inside is like no other pain. Rachel came in when the frequency wasn't that much and said if I wanted something for pain to let her know, but I was operating under some sort of delusion that I didn't have real contractions yet and they were managable. Well clearly that ended soon, because a few contractions in and she came back and I was all about the pain management ASAP. I always knew I was getting an epidural, but I thought it was too early at this point. However, she said past 3 cm, which I came in at, I could have it. So I jumped on board, headed to pee one last time, and literally before I got out of the bathroom the anesthetist was in the room and ready to go.
The epidural itself was really easy for me mentally since I am not someone who freaks out about needles and what not. It was quick, painless, and easy. He said it would kick in about 15 minutes but I swear it was so much quicker. By 5:30 a.m. I had my epidural and ladies there has not been a sweeter invention! Ever. My legs were heavy and beautiful tingly, the pain disappeared, I loved everyone, I felt so incredible and I could focus on the world around me again. And I slept! Oh that epidural is amazing! I can't even begin to explain how relief from that kind of pain feels like... Bliss. Pure bliss.
Okay, enough about the epidural - which I would marry if I could...
Somewhere during my snoozing I heard Rachel say to DM she was off and that congratulations and good luck. I liked Rachel. She was pretty awesome. Then I got a new nurse. A sweet, pretty Indian girl with a Sikh name I missed. I swear she was probably the age of my little sister, which made me feel old- even though I realize you are all rolling your eyes at my 25 years of youth. We really hit it off too, and she was there for the rest of my labor.
At 9:15 she checked me and I was 6-7 cm dialated. Another beautiful thing about the epidural is that they can prod you up there as far as they like and it doesn't hurt. That epidural, I tell you... Anyways, after that my little guys heart rate kept dropping because of the cord being wrapped around his neck and they were a little concerned. So again at 9:30 they decided to check again and I was at 10 cm. At some point I had met the new doctor, a pretty brunette who said to DM, "I recognize you from somewhere." Turns out she was a few years ahead of him at medical school. I liked her a lot, but I was high so I pretty much liked everyone at this point! They decided it was best to get me pushing, so it began. Since I couldn't feel my contractions, aside from intense pressure on my butt in the middle of the contraction, they had to tell me when to start pushing. Eventually I knew when they were starting and could do it myself. Apparently I was a really good pusher, because literally a few pushes in the nurse wanted me to stop since she 'didn't want to deliver him' and I was going too fast. The whole time DM and the nurse were telling me about how much hair he had I was thinking, "you are all bull shitting me to get me to push more," but apparently they weren't. Since you can't feel any pain you can't imagine his head is crowning!
There was some issue about how the doctor was going to a C-section and they wanted to decide whether she would come to me first or that. I don't know what happened, but soon enough the doctor was there and we were really on the final push. She was also of the opinion that I was a 'unreal pusher,' but that may be something they just say to get you all motivated. Either way it worked and I just focused and pretended each push was going to be the one that did it, even though I knew otherwise. At one point the doctor said, "mom the head is out, you want to touch it?" and I was completely about it so I reached down and rubbed it and it was covered in hair, wet, and squishy and I just couldn't believe it. And then eventually they told me to stop pushing (a order I had told time and time again to heed by girlfriends who had torn like nobodies business) so I was zoned in on the doctors voice waiting to hear it, and then she got me to do little pulsing pushes. In the blink of an eye he slid out of me and the feeling was emptiness. Like I had been left with less than I started with.
At 10:27 a.m. my baby boy Zain was born and he came out screaming.
He was 20 inches long and weighed 7 lb. 2 oz.
They said he sounded a bit mucousy since he came out so fast he hadn't been squeezed long enough to clear his lungs. I always thought I would be hysterical, like in "A Baby Story," even though I am not a hysterical person. I figured that is just what happens, but I was happy and calm. I looked at him, smiled and said, "hi baby." They asked if I wanted him on my chest right away, and I said 'yes please' and I just stared at him. Just stared. OMG okay here come the tears. I guess writing about it is different from living it with all the chaos. In between gazing at my baby the doctor told me my placenta came out, and eventually they took Zain away to clean and weigh him while the nurse massaged my stomach.
I asked the doctor and her resident if I tore and she said that I had a small second degree one, and I lay there listening to the doctor instruct the resident how to place the stitches. Residents don't really worry me, they have to learn at some point. You can't feel anything even at this point so you don't realize that being stitched up from front to back, no matter how 'minor,' will be the most arduous part of this experience. Thank god for Motrin!
They finally brought him back, and DM and I were in a daze. In my case one that was not drug induced. I was in awe, he was just ecstatic. After waiting so long he was finally here. DM had called our parents when I started pushing and soon they came to visit me and baby. Eventually they moved me to my post-partum recovery room. We wanted a private room, but due to high volume there were none available and I had to share one with a woman who had just had a C-section with a thin curtain in between and one bathroom. Not the highlight of the experience, but it was fine considering I knew I would be discharged after one night. Our parents and my sisters hung out for a bit and then I sent DM with them to go for lunch.
I'll take it from there in the next post! So much more to tell.
Until then, I am going to enjoy my little Monkey! He is cuter every single day. I love him so much.
Eeep! I didn't know you were GBS+ too! I am NOT looking forward to the IV. I hope I go in already having contractions and not because my water breaks.
ReplyDeleteLove your story! You should share it with the group!
Lol the water breaking is kind of gross. I'll share it when I get a moment! How are you feeling? Getting so close!
Delete